Lifting a 5 Lug, 1998 Tacoma

Hello, this is my first post - I need some help building a lift kit since I cant find a complete one for more than a 2" lift. I have a 1998 Tacoma, 5 lugs RWD, base model. I've read around the 5lug thread as well as the 1st gen tacoma threads for options and I've already gone through and ordered some parts, but I still have some questions.

I would have liked 6" inches, but I don't think I can reach that, so I'm fine with 3"-5".

I've ordered:
3" Fabtech Lift Spindle
SQR SPC Upper Control Arms
Torch 1.5"-2" add a leaf kit, comes with the 2 inch spacer for the front
and a 2" Lift Shackle.

All this looks like 5" up front and an additional ~3.5"-4" in the rear. It's already sitting at a rake so it should balance out. I also have a snugtop camper shell.

I know I need new shocks, its a 27 year old truck, but I still have some confusion. I called shockswarehouse to cancel my order of Bilstein 4600's, and its good that I did because apparently they wouldn't even work with what I'm shooting for. Would I need 5100s? Also apparently I need bigger coils to match the lift. Since I'm using a 3" Spindle lift, do I still need a bigger spring? If I don't, cool; but if I do, would OME 2880's be enough for what I have? Would 5100's work with the OME 2880's? In conjunction, I've only been able to find 3.5" fabtech lifted shocks for the front, and either way I don't think it would work anyhow? Its too big for 3" and too small for 5". I've already forked out more than $1000 and still have no idea what I'm doing. I even reached out to places around me that do lifts, and they ONLY do lift KITS, so they have no idea how to help me out.

Should I give up on the 5" and just aim for the 3" lift with the spindle up front, because ultimately my goal was to just get some bigger tires so potholes and bumps aren't as bad; Maybe a meaner look too.

Thanks in advance!

Jo